Help! He Thinks I’m Fat

When she got married she was a size 2. After their daughter was born she was a size 14. Two years later instead of losing weight she was a size 18. Instead of hitting the gym or losing the “baby fat” she hit post partum depression and threw in the towels resolving to the fact that she was just big and “he better loves me for who I am on the inside rather than the outside.” He did love her for the person she was, but his looks on her enormously large size 18 body and 40-DD chest and a g-string that turned into booty-floss that got buried under all those “loafs of bread” did not make her feel the sexiest or most attractive woman in the world. But she didn’t care any more. I’m sure you’ve heard similar stories.

So what are you to do when you feel stuck in a body you don’t want to be in, fighting a depression that makes you feel guilty for having it in the first place since you just gave birth to another life and are “supposed to” float on cloud nine. You’re so uncomfortable that by now you have resorted to slip-on shoes since you can barely bend over long enough to tie your shoes.

By this time the excuses of caring for a small child keep you away from the gym, for good seeming reason. So you resort to diets and starving yourself - the weight has to come off somehow, even though we know that 95% of all diets fail. So we fall deeper and deeper into the hole of depression and the mountain of excuses soon seems to swallow us alive.

The strain on your marriage grows heavier and thoughts of leaving this marriage start crossing your mind. What would happen to you if you left?

And yet, life goes on - with or without you!

Rather than leaving your marriage in the hopes for peace and being left alone, here are 5 steps you can take that can assist you in regaining great health and igniting that new flame into your relationship:

1. Stop all excuses. Instead of focusing on all the excuses that prevent you from losing weight, start focusing on all the good things that come to you from having a sexy figure. Trust that since you have had a slim figure in the past, you will get there again in the near future. No one is asking you to lose all the weight by next week, just get started and stay consistent.

2. Know that this is not about him, this is all about you. You are in this together, yes, but losing the weight for him is superficial and will only make your weight loss temporary. You must want to lose the weight for you and you only. You are the one feeling unhealthy or unattractive and you want to feel great about yourself. Having your partner be attracted to you once again is an added bonus and benefit and can serve as a motivator, but it should not be the main reason.

3. Don’t be rebellious and do what I did and put your hands on your hips with a bad attitude: “He ought to love me for me not for what I look like.” I’m sure he loves you no matter what, but you also must learn that most men are stimulated by visuals (and are equally as turned off by them). That is part of the biological make-up and no matter how much you want to rebel against it, you’re only hurting yourself and him as well. Accept Mother Nature for what she has created and know that she works perfectly at all times, either with you or against you, the choice is yours.

 

About the Author:

Chaszey Sandhriel is a author and seminar leader empowering women to be the best they already are. For free insights and tips visit her site at http://www.itsmyweightloss.com/products. Or visit her extensive blog at http://itsmyweightloss.blogspot.com